Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Ok, so your number is... 867-5309? Awesome. I'll call you sometime.

So this past weekend, I went to CTOPS registration.  It was one of the most fun weekends I have had in a good while thanks to drunkenness, amazingly bodacious seventeen year olds, and being able to drive faster than 35mph in a majority of the city.

Friday is slow. We hang out at Chimble's house, play some guitar hero, watch a TERRIBLE show called Awesometown, and then go to pick up his drunk friend Karma. As it turn out, Karma is completely wasted I promised her that I wouldn't write about her, but I have to include this one awesome occurrence of the night. She was throwing up in the bathtub for a good hour or so when she finally decided to get out. Being the nice friends that we are, Chimble and I attempt to help her make it safely out of the tub and into some real clothes.

Despite living there for a good two weeks, he has no idea which nozzle in his shower controls which temperature. As soon as he tries to turn the water off, the bathroom starts to fill with steam and the screams of burning woman. I'm sitting by the sink, laughing, and watching him fiddle with the nozzles for a good ten seconds before he runs out of the room and goes to enlist the help of his roommate Steve.

Saturday night, we go over to a house  party. There are a good 30 people there, but one girl caught my interest. In a house full of Seersucker and Polo attire, she was wearing a cliche' 70's headband with matching shirt, some BDG jeans, and black clogs embedded with fake looking diamonds. You can tell that she's the Janis Joplin kind of girl who lives under the influence, and smokes a pack a day.

So I sit down and instantly start shooting as much game as I can. She was mine. A few lines of mine:

"Yeah, I'm going to school here next semester. I'm like, number one in my class or something back home."
"Oh, you're from the mountains? I love mountains. Some people call me an "Outdoors man". "
"You smoke American Spirits?  Cool!"
"Hell yeah, I love to paint. You should see some of my work. Pretty much all I do in my apartment is smoke and paint."
"I just got out of an abusive relationship."

It was pretty much my typical mack AKA I just made up stuff about myself.  Everything was going fine. She said we were soulmates. And then she had to leave.

Seeing my opportunity about to disappear, I decided to ask her for her number.  I told her I'd give her a call sometime soon.

After she left I asked her friend if she had given me her real number.
Whale: "She gave you xxx-xx19, right?"
Kane: *Looks at phone, sees xxx-xx20* "...Yes. Of course"
Whale: "...Really?"
Kane: *Drunk* "NO. :(*

1 comment:

Frantz Fanon said...

This story is true on so many levels. Same thing happened to me.