Tuesday, March 18, 2008


Intelligence, according to Wikipedia, is an umbrella term used to describe a property of the mind that encompasses many related abilities, such as the capacities to reason, to plan, to solve problems, to think abstractly, to comprehend ideas, to use language, and to learn.

After spending the last few nights of my life wasting away to countless episodes of CSI: Las Vegas, I have come to the conclusion that they are wrong.

Gil Grissom is the man. Anyone who watches the show knows that. When it comes to getting stuff done, he is numero uno. If you commit a crime, you are getting caught under his watch. Don't even bother messing around with the evidence, getting false testimony, changing your gender, killing the witnesses, etc. It's no good against this gumshoe.

I consider Grissom to be the epicenter of intelligence. The modern day Coeus. By diving deeper into his personality, it has allowed me to get a bird's-eye view of what intelligence really is. It's not being able to find the derivative of the limit of the log of ln(x). It's not being able to deeply analyze the world, make profound psycological breakthroughs, or even developing ideas that rock the foundation of society.

It's about knowing random facts, and being able to introject them in conversation at the correct time.
- Being able to console that cross-dresser by telling her about oysters that are able to spontaneously change gender.
- Knowing the key ingredients to everything ever made, and what the human bodies reaction to each ingredient is.
- Making references to Van Gogh when a victim is missing their ears.
- Confusious: "If you try and chase two rabbits you end up losing them both."
- Countless more examples that I can't even begin to fathom at the moment. I don't have enough time to list them all.

I present you the smartest man alive.

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